The Renaissance Woman

If you’ll pardon my vomit breath.

Is that a threat?

When scrolling through a sea of pins, only two words stand out here. And exercise isn’t the first thing to come to mind when I see them.

Although, I think your leg probably weighs more than 10 lbs.

So I had an awesome train of thought today.

I tied up a large part of a project at work that has been really frustrating for the last week and a half. So I thought I would reward myself with a Mocha Shake from the Tully’s downstairs from my office.

The I had the negative thought: Maybe I shouldn’t be rewarding myself with sweets. *starts feeling bad about myself* Meh.

Then I thought: Wait, ‘I’m upset that I’m overweight (possibly) due to having too many sweets as a self-reward. That mean’s I’d have to be rewarding myself a lot.

Then I got a huge grin on my face and though: I’m overweight because I’m too awesome too often!

…and I instantly felt better and got myself that Mocha Shake.

(Note: I seriously doubt that this is the actual cause of my weight issues – this is the only shake I’ve had this week and I only had one last week. It’s not like I reward myself for being awesome at the drop of a hat. Not to mention having no caffeine despite three 7am meetings last week. But the route my brain took made me laugh, which is better than if it had decided to stop on the initial guilty/shamed thought.)

“Oh my God! It’s eating my brains!!!”

“BBBRRAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIDDDDSSSSSS!”

…which looks like Jesus’s publicity poster for his world tour.